Sick Musician Problems

I’m now entering my 11th day of the most resilient cold ever. When packs upon pack of medication fail to kick it in the butt, you know your body is not in a great state. Though I have managed to catch up on all my TV shows and watch seasons worth of new shows, I haven’t been able to do the one thing I love, and that’s create musical content. Whether it be a YouTube video, writing a new song or posting a picture of me in the studio, I’m usually all over it every week. So I apologise on behalf of my germs for being radio silent these last 2 weeks. And while laying on the couch unable to lift my head, I’ve learned a few things about how an epic cold completely cripples a musician.

You can’t:

  1. Play guitar
  2. Sing
  3. Perform
  4. Have shower sing-a-longs
  5. Hear music properly with blocked ears
  6. Think of any new song ideas
  7. Record new YouTube videos
  8. Take any Instagram photos
  9. Think of something funny to Tweet about

So, basically there’s not much else for us to do.

Now perhaps this may come across as me not being able to deal with a simple cold, but its more about proving that a musician is useless when sick.

We could still try sing, but no one wants to hear those nasal, pitchy, strained vocals. I tried singing in the shower last night, and every note of The Little Mermaid’s Part Of Your World ended in a coughing fit that turned to choking.

We could still try play guitar, but when you’re passing out over the top or considering throwing up inside it, I think I’ll put the guitar back on its stand. I suppose I could still try strumming while laying down with the guitar on my chest. But that just seems uncomfortable and probably useless

We could take Instagram photos, but without a dislike button, it would just frustrate everyone. And we don’t want to lose followers because we showed them our snotty noses and black rings around our saggy eyes. Realising it had been forever since I posted a picture, I thought I’ll post one of my cat, but even he didn’t want to come near me. So I sulked all the way back to my bed.

I could record a YouTube video, but I wouldn’t want to distort the audio with my chesty cough and sniffing into the microphone. I am hoping to be well enough to record a particular video this week. I don’t care if I don’t feel well, I just need my voice to not be croaky and honestly hurtful to everyone’s ears.

I’ve had to perform important shows while sick before, and it wasn’t pretty. Of course if you have scheduled shows, you want to perform them no matter how you’re feeling. But when your performance is literally going to be terrible, you don’t want to waste anyone’s time. We can easily power through feeling gross on stage, we just don’t want to embarrass ourselves with our bad voices.

The worst part of a cold for me is not being able to listen to music. No matter how loud I turn it up, I can barely hear a thing besides every high frequency. The bass disappears. Cause I’m all about that treble, bout that treble, no bass. I cannot wait to listen to a good bass-y song when my ears finally pop. I feel like I’m like 500,000 feet in the air and my ears haven’t equalised. AHH!

So fingers crossed this cold will move on soon, because I’m over it. There’s only so much “rest” and “liquid upkeep” I can do before boredom will get the better of me. And to make up for not posting a photo or video or anything at all for like 2 weeks, here is a picture of my best friend, the tissue box, as we watched season 2 of Jane The Virgin.